The Mickey and Minnie Mouse “Ger Your Ears On” Celebration is gathering steam at the Disneyland Resort. Still, Disney’s restless merchandising department has found ample time to shoe in another well-marketed observance. Valentine’s Day is right around the corner. If you haven’t considered spending the day at Disneyland with a loved one, Disney hopes to help change your mind. Maybe even make a month out of it. The specialty food items they have put forth toward that end may just do the trick.

Specifically, go get this masterful creation called the Strawberry Cheesecake “Funnel of Love,” available from Frontierland’s Stage Door Café. Officially, it is funnel cake covered with cheesecake filling, strawberry compote, whipped cream, and a Minnie-Mouse resemblant chocolate bow. Honestly, it’s the best edible innovation since Disney’s first churro. In a properly functioning society (debatable), this delicacy will one day rival the Dole Whip in popularity. At the very least, we need to keep buying this item in a manner that it becomes a permanent offering.

The charming theme and color scheme make this an ideal Valentine’s Day dessert. But, beware, the “Funnel of Love” will test even the most committed couple. It’s a decent sized dish, especially for the price, and apparently suited for sharing. Take one bite, though, and you will begin to seriously reassess your relationship. You will need to be passionately, unshakably in love with someone to successfully share this with them. Deep meaningful friendships have ended for less than this. Just consider yourself warned.

Valentine’s Month is happening now at Disneyland, and shall continue through February 18, 2019. Don’t be afraid to go by yourself, especially to get your own “Funnel of Love.” It may be the only thing that keeps you together.